-2-

Two weeks have passed and I’m still recovering from the hugest hangover ever. I have been drinking and partying for 3 nights straight and things got out of hand. When I say things I mean the drinking. One would think that night clubs would follow the “you have to be 21 to drink” rule but in Hollywood that didn’t matter depending on who you were. And seeing as people love to talk about me the drinks just kept coming and coming.

*coming in*

Jeca: Hey you want to go shopping with me?

Karina: Uhh yea. *fakes smiles*

I really didn’t want to go but I accepted anyway. It wasn’t because I wasn’t in the mood or anything like that. It was because I was going with my sister.

My relationship with my sister has never been a good one. She’s the perfect child while I’m the devil’s child. She’s the smart one while I’m the dumb one. She’s the day while I’m the night. She’s basically everything that I’m not and my parents love her for that.

Because of the constant comparison of us two I’ve distanced myself from her. I want others to see that I’m me, Karina, and I could never be like Jessica.

---

Shortly after eating breakfast we left. We decided to go to the mall where we could shop til we drop without getting wet since it was raining. The mall was pretty empty since it was Wednesday and everyone was either working or in school. We shopped for about two hours before we got hungry and went to the food court. Right after we were done eating a little girl came up to us with a guy right behind her.

Little girl: Excuse me Miss Jessica

Jeca: Yea sweety

Little girl: Can I take a picture with you?

Jeca: *smiles* Sure sweety

Little girl: *happy* Carlos take a picture

Carlos: ok

Jeca took several pictures with the little girl. The guy who was taking the pictures, Carlos I assumed, looked familiar. I had seen him somewhere but I just couldn’t figure out from where.

I didn’t put much thought into it because I was busy paying attention to the little girl. She was so happy I couldn’t help but smile. I love little kids. They’re clueless to the hard realities of this world and had no worries. They’re the ones who truly are living the good life.

Jeca gave the little girl a hug and returned to her seat. Her phone started ringing and she picked up. It was my father. A couple of minutes later Jeca hung up.

Jeca: *putting her phone away* Dad wants to see us.

Karina: What he want to see me for?

Jeca: I don’t know. Did you do something to piss him off?

Karina: Besides opening his bottle of Chivas, nothing.

Jeca: Why would you do that?

Karina: Because it was just sitting there.

Jeca: When are you going to stop doing the shit you’re doing?

Karina: I’m not doing anything.

Jeca: Yes you are. What you think that all the underage drinking is cool or something?

Karina: I do it because I want to. Not because I think it’s cool.

Jeca: *shakes her head* You need to stop all of that and do something productive with your life.

Karina: *laughs* And what be like you? Nah I’m alright.

Jeca: You’re 19 years old. Grow up. Cut all the bullshit because if you continue you’re going to end up 6 feet under.

Karina: Whatever.

Jeca: I’m serious Karina.

Karina: Why can’t you just let me be?

Jeca: Because you need help.

Karina: Help for what. I’m perfectly fine.

Jeca: No you’re not. You’re hooked on drugs and alcohol. That's not good for you. I’m not telling you to follow in my footsteps-

Karina: Good because I would never want to be you. Now are you ready to go because I’m done shopping.

Jeca: Yea

We exited the mall and made our way home before going to see dad. Jeca was pissed and so was I. It wasn’t the first time that we had that conversation. Nor was it going to be the last. I knew that what I was doing was not good. But as long as I have control of my substance abuse everything is okay.

As soon as I walked into my room I headed into my walk in closet. I grabbed my favorite BCBG bag and opened it up. Inside was the little bag of weed-my favorite-that I planned on smoking tonight. Even if it was for a little while getting high always made me forget about my problems. I needed that tonight especially since I had a feeling that I was not going to like what my dad had to say.

-3-

Just like I had predicted my dad had nothing good to say. After Perez Hilton, the queen of all media criticized his parenting skills he decided to be “more of a father.” So he made up a couple of rules. I have to be home by 11 pm. I have to get a job. I have to stop associating with the people that I do. And the list goes on and on. If my dad thinks that I’m going to follow all those rules he’s wrong. He’s treating me like a child when im not. Im a 19 year old adult and I can do whatever I want. Plus it aint like he actually cares. All my dad cares about is a 6 letter word. And it’s just too bad for him that I stopped caring about that word a long time ago.

---

Tonight I’m going out with my ex Juan. Im kind of nervous because its my first time seeing and speaking to him in almost 2 years. I hope that everything goes well because I just want to have a good time.

We decided to go to Elsie’s, my favorite restaurant. Its located outside of the paparazzi zone so we knew that there wasn’t going to be any cameras flashing.

Juan arrived at my house and it was just like old times. It wasn’t until he grabbed my hand and walked me to his car that I realized how much I’ve missed him.

The ride to Elsie’s was full of laughter and happiness. I had my friend back. We entered Elsie’s and sat at a booth. Marci, our waitress for the night brought us our drinks and told us that our food would be ready in 20 minutes.

Karina: So how have you been these past 2 years? You just disappeared without saying anything.

Juan: After everything that happened between us I needed a break so I went to Nicaragua.

Karina: Why Nicaragua?

Juan: Because that’s where the dart landed.

Karina: Oh

Juan: So what about you? How have these past 2 years been treating you?

Karina: *looks away* Not good.

Juan: How come? *grabs her hand and she looks at him*

Karina: I've changed since that day and you leaving didn’t make things any better.

Juan: *kisses her hand* I'm sorry.

That day is cemented in my head forever. I can't get over it. I won't get over it. Juan says he’s sorry and I believe him but it’s not his fault. He’s just another victim.

Juan: Hey, happy thoughts ok?

Karina: *whispers* Ok

Juan: So tell me any boyfriends?

Karina: *chuckles* No, any girlfriends?

Juan: No

Karina: Just hoes?

Juan: Nope, no hoes.

Karina: Hmmm

Juan: What about your drinking?

Karina: I enjoy it.

Juan: And the drugs? Do you enjoy that too?

Karina: Yea. I enjoy the drinking and drugs. It makes me feel better.

Juan didn’t say anything. He knew that if he kept on it was going to turn into an argument. And that’s the last thing that he wants on his first night back in LA.

Our silence was broken when a group of about 10 people walked in. The little girl and the guy from the mall were among those people. They sat two tables away from us. One of the girls noticed me and told her friends. All of the girls looked my way and gave me bad looks. The looks didn’t bother me. I'm used to them already.

-At the other table-

Marie: That bi-witch is here?

Carlos: What witch?

Marie: The rich witch. She over there *points* with some guy. Probably her new boy toy for the night.

Carlos: *looks* Oh. What does it matter anyway?

Yanalis: Her and her friends insulted you. It matters.

Gaby: I want to see a witch. Where is she? *starts to look around*

Claudia: No where Gaby. Don’t worry about it.

Gaby: *points* Look Carlos. It’s the girl from yesterday. She was with Jessica. I want to say hi to her.

Marie: No Gaby. Why would you want to do that?

Gaby: Because I can. Can I go Carlos? Please?

Carlos: No Gaby.

Gaby: Please Carlos! Pretty please!

Carlos: Fine. But I'm not going with you.

Marie: I’ll go with you.

Jose: Don’t start anything Marie.

Marie: Im not don’t worry.

*Marie and Gaby walk over to the table where Karina is at*

Gaby: Excuse me miss pretty girl

Karina: *smiles* Hey cutie

Gaby: I saw you yesterday with Jessica Lozado and I wanted to say hi.

Marie: *under her breath* I don’t know for what.

Karina: *ignoring Marie* Well hey. What’s your name?

Gaby: Gabrielle but everyone calls me Gaby.

Karina: Well Gaby Im Karina but everyone calls me-

Marie: *under her breath* Hoe.

Karina: NaNa

Gaby: NaNa?

Karina: Yea

Marie: Come on Gaby you said hi already. Let’s go.

Gaby: Ok bye NaNa. Can you tell Jessica I said hi?

Karina: I will. Have a good night Gaby.

*Marie and Gaby walk back to their table. Karina looks at Juan.*

Karina: Well she was a bitch.

Juan: Yea

Karina: *putting a fry in her mouth* I was expecting that anyway. She was giving me dirty looks since she came in.

---

*drinking water*

Karina: You want to go to Ice?

Juan: Yea lets go cause I believe we’re still tied. *gets up*

Karina: *rolls her eyes* I hope you're ready to lose *gets up*

Juan: *grabs her hand and walks toward the cashier* Ha keep dreaming.

While Juan paid the bill I looked over at the table with Gaby. She was the youngest one out of the group but that didn’t stop her from joining the conversation. I could tell she was smart for her age.

The skinniest one out of the girls saw me looking and told the girl that was calling me a hoe. The girl gave me a cold stare. I just turned away. I got the keys from Juan and told him that I was going to meet him at his car. My night was going alright and I didn’t want any bitch interfering with my happiness.

We arrived at Ice and it didn’t take long for the paparazzi to realize that I was with Juan Herrera. Cameras started flashings twice as much and the crowd around us was ridiculous. The photographers and their agencies where both going to make a lot of money tonight.

After what seemed forever we finally got to the entrance. We entered the club and headed upstairs to the VIP area. Ali and them were already there having themselves some Sex on the Beach. When they saw Juan they ran up to him and hugged him. I guess its safe to say that Juan was missed.

---

We decided to call it a night around 1. It was really early compared to the normal 4 am exits that I be making. But I didn’t mind leaving early because I had a good night.

We were both hungry from all the dancing that we did so we called up Dominoes since it was on our way home. We made the order pick up. Juan stayed in the car while I went to get the pizza. I waited for a lil while until the pizza was done. As I paying the guy from earlier walked in. It then hit me. The guy from earlier, from the mall, was the guy that delivered the pizzas at my house that day. Ali had insulted him and I apologized for it. I was being nice but he went and told his friends that I had insulted him. I didn’t appreciate that. I would've told him something about it but it wasn’t the appropriate time. He was working and it wouldn’t be professional. Instead I just finished paying and left. But not before deciding that this wasn’t going to be the last time that I saw him.

When we got to my house my dad was waiting for me outside. He was mad but when he saw who I was with his frown turned into a smile. I just rolled my eyes and walked inside. A couple of minutes later both of them walked in announcing that tomorrow the Lozado and Herrera Families were going to have a huge get together at Mr. Chow.